OK if you cannot deal with explicit descriptions of scatological functions, do not proceed.

So I took my first glutamine today while I was on I-87. I have been mostly on the constipated end of the scale, but of course now that I was mid-roadtrip, I went from 0 to 60. Within minutes of taking my first pill of the day, I felt the rumblings from within.

As I counted down the miles to the next rest stop, the despiration increased exponentially. I started to sweat and my sphincter began to buckle. Soon I was involuntarily deeply breathing and the contractions were less and less far apart. I was cursing like sailor as I realized I wasn't going to make it to the rest stop. I pulled off the next exit, paid the toll and burned rubber into a McDonalds.

I almost didn't make it into the bowl as I forcefully expelled the prior 24-hours worth of intake -- completely undigested. Peas, asparagas, spring greens all untouched and recognizable. This has been a continuing problem for me, but apparently glutamine wasn't providing the miracle solution. It's supposed to promote digestion, but so much for that.. All it did was promote excretion.

Then when I got off the road, I crashed. No second wind. So we're 0 for 2 so far.

To be continued..